Showing posts with label spam. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spam. Show all posts

24.4.07

Web Noise / Internetrauschen

Neues Spam-Phänomen?

Seit einigen Tagen bekomme ich Spam, der als Reportage über Terroranschläge oder dgl. daherkommt und zum Schluss auf eine Webseite verweist. Heute kam schon von
info_@presse.mdwp.de
das folgende Prachtstück kreativer, wenn auch grammatikalisch und stilistisch nicht ganz hasenreiner Prosa:

Die Berliner U-Bahn Mitarbeiter fanden die Reste eines unbekannten Flugkoerpers.
Interessant findet man auch die Ermittlung von moeglichen Gruenden des Unwohlseins einiger U-Bahn Angestellten. Nach etlichen Inspektionen wurde ein Fremdkoerper gefunden. Wie Wissenschaftler behaupten, koennte der Koerper so gross wie ein Bus sein. Es wurde auch vermutet, er haette seltsame Strahlen aussenden koennen und das wegen rund um dem Rumpf gebildeter "Totzone".
Naeheres dazu unter http://geocities.com/MarkabElsie7932

Die Webseite gibt es nicht. Normalerweise ist ja absolut davon abzuraten, auf Links zu klicken, die in Spam enthalten sind, doch schien mir diese Adresse beim Gratis-Hoster Geocities unverdächtig genug, um es zu auszuprobieren.

Möglicherweise hat Geocities bereits auf Spam-Complaints zu dieser Seite reagiert und sie entfernt.

Insgesamt frage ich mich aber, was diese Art von Spam eigentlich für Ziele verfolgt. Denkbar wären:
  • Stören einfach um des Störens willen. Daraus scheinen manche Leute eine ungeheure, wenn auch nicht auf Anhieb nachvollziehbare Befriedigung zu schöpfen.
  • Aufmerksamkeitshascherei. Das ist wie bei einem kleinen Kind, das ignoriert wird und sich deshalb durch Danebenbenimm Aufmerksamkeit erzwingt. Allerdings ist die Aufmerksamkeit in diesem Falle ausschließlich anonym. Das ist jammerschade!
  • Gekicher des Spammers hinter vorgehaltener Hand über den Ärger bzw. die Fragezeichen, den bzw. die seine "Messages" auslösen. Das könnte man in etwa vergleichen mit dem Kunstsammler, der sich an einem gestohlenen Gemälde befriedigt, das er in seinem Keller aufhängt und das niemand sonst zu sehen bekommen darf.
  • Web Noise / Internetrauschen. Sowas scheint es tatsächlich zu geben. Allerdings dürfte es wohl, im Gegensatz zum Rauschen beim Funkempfang, nicht durch beiläufige Störungen entstehen. Da braucht es schon einen realen menschlichen Anstoß.
Mit Sicherheit lässt sich nur eines sagen: dieses Phänomen wird – wie aller Spam – durch gestörtes Verhalten ausgelöst.

13.4.07

Spam, so wohlschmeckend wie die Ewigkeit!

Der Sloganizer, gefüttert mit Spam, wohlschmeckend und tun

Ein Schwesterprodukt von Poetron (siehe letzter Artikel) ist der Sloganizer, der auf die Werbebranche spezialisiert ist.

10.4.07

Nigeria comes to UK

Peter Fischer wants to give away millions

This lovely e-mail reached me today under the subject Hello Beloved Friend:
Dear Sir/Madam,

Please permit me to introduce myself to you. I am PETER FISCHER, An Accountant in London, United Kingdom. I got your contact from the British Council, and I have decided to contact you so that we can carry out this mutually beneficial business transaction.
My late Client (A National of your COUNTRY) until his death aboard an AERO FLIGHT 801 in 2001 deposited a total of USD$5.5M with THAMES BANK, UNITED KINGDOM.
He gave me the custody of the deposit documents, and as such entrusted me with the Legal Rights to transfer and execute this deposit to any Next of Kin after his demise.
I have since tried to locate any Next of Kin without success, hence I decided to contact you so that you can rightfully stand as the next of kin to inherit the deposited sum by virtue of the fact you share the same SURNAME as my late CLIENT.
I am writing you confidentialy because you will be able to claim this DEPOSIT because you have the same SURNAME as my Late CLIENT.
You will be entitled to 30% of the total sum should you be willing to assist me in this business transaction, 10% will be earmarked for taxation expense and I will get the remaining 60%.
I will prepare a formal agreement to guide us in this transaction for accountability purpose.
Please reply to my private email:
peter_fischer44@yahoo.co.uk

Yours truly, PETER FISCHER
42 Campshill Road, London
United Kingdom.
Tel: + 44 793 997 8490
Email: peter_fischer44@yahoo.co.uk
  • Good to know I'm known to the British Council.
  • Nigerian scam has come a long way. At least the grammar and spelling in this one are OK. Congrats, Peter, you seem to have gone to school.
  • Thanks for your special, individual confidence in me, Peter, which I probably only share with the millions of other SURNAMES you sent this mail to.
  • Sorry to hear about your LATE client. I'm sure he had the confidence in you that you doubtlessly deserve.
  • At this point, I cannot make use of your offer, Peter. But maybe lots of other potential and fully confidential business partners will send you e-mail and give you calls as I've decided to make this public.

28.3.07

Where to get dysfunction online

Have erectile dysfunction?
Look no where else

Cheapest online!
This lovely message reached me again today as so many times in the recent past, this time with
was closed while bathing
as the subject. For further elucidation, the following was offered (among other garbled text in English and something resembling Spanish):
Living wait refreshing baths.

To get dysfunction online, send mail to ser (husband@parview.com) or report http://leeta.hk/ to the best spam busting addresses.

25.3.07

Unbelievable Sir

Money's to be had at the drop of a hat, and spammers are quick to alert anyone to the fact. Today the alert came from Lionello Ramchandra, the best of at least two worlds, so to speak, who hails from laureanosioux@atlanta.com, adding yet other ethnic dimensions.
His heart-warming message:

Unbelievable Sir
Home-owner,
You have been pre-approved for a Home Loan at a Fixed Rate.
This offer is being extended to you unconditionally and we will work with=
you regardless your credit
http://mortsakjekh.blogspot.com/

To take Advantage of this Limited Time opportunity all
we ask is that you visit our Website and complete
the 1 minute post Approval Form.
http://mortsakjailyuyu.blogspot.com/

Thank for reading.


Endorsement Assistant
http://mortsavinkily.blogspot.com/



My email wastes your time? Oops there


Nice afterthought, that "oops there".

Everybody please visit mortsavinkily.blogsopt.com and flag it.

Yours sincerely,

Unbelievable Sir Home-Owner

16.3.07

Ein Blog nur für die Spammer

Für alle, die noch nicht wissen, von welchem wundervollen Fleischprodukt die Bezeichung für die Epidemie abgeleitet wurde, unter der die heutige E-Mail-Welt leidet. Eigentlich wäre der Firma Hormel dringend anzuraten, ein paar findige Rechtsanwälte anzuheuern, um die Spammer wegen Missbrauchs eines geschützten Warenzeichens zu verklagen.

Soeben bin ich über einen Blog gestolpert, der sich unserer geliebten Freunde von der nicht (oder allzu sehr oder leider) zur Gruppe der Hominiden gehörenden Art der Spammer annimmt:


Ganz konsequent lautet der Untertitel auf der Seite

Hier könnte Ihre Werbung stehen!

25.2.07

Mutations of Viagra / spam discovers linguistics

Some drug peddling spammers are getting awfully inventive. Here's what reached me today from Antoinette Bray with the subject "Brother who had been":

Vaigrra S0tf Tabs 4. 12
Propeoica 1. 03
Caildis 5. 65
Geneeirc Vayigra 3. 58
Levttira 11. 98
Pajxil 2. 07
Ambvien 2. 84
Lormazepam 1. 79
Xanwax 2. 83
Zoloyft 1. 12
Purce Natrtual Hoonda 39. 97
Cllohmid 1. 88
Hooiqda Patnch 43. 34
Lipvtior 2. 20
Laslix 0. 53

Some of these mutations have great literary/linguistic potential. If Lovecraft were alive, I'm sure he'd use some.

"Pajxil" = Mayan?
"Caildis" = Celtic?
"Xanwax" = new brand name for waxed dental floss product in Germany?
"Hooiqda Patnch" = Sanskrit-based Indic language?
"Propeoica" = lost play by Aristophanes

But the "Purce Natrtual Hoonda" is the best of all, some Nahuatl thrown in with Japanese as far as I can tell.

Thanks, Tony (who ever you may be), for not giving up on me after thousands of similar mails failed to get me hooked on any of these drugs.

31.12.06

Emery Felix tells me I have a history

Thanks, Em!

Here's what he wrote:
Your history shows that your last order is ready for refilling.
That kind of history kind of surprised me ... but perhaps I shouldn't be surprised in this age of identity theft. I've probably got more histories than I will ever know apart from the various ones I know of or have actively created.

Generally speaking, though, I'm still surprised - even after years of receiving unsolicited mail, as this junk is called politically correctly - that anybody would get in touch with me, tell me a blatant lie right off the bat and then expect me to hurry to their store and leave money there even though they do their damndest to make sure that nobody can find out who they're doing business with.

Does spam make any sense?

I don't think anybody in his right mind thinks it does.

And yet there seem to be enough brazen shysters out there that believe they can make a buck by sending out millions of unwanted advertisements to millions of people who definitely do not want each and every one of those millions of unwanted advertisements.

This appears to be as great a conflict of interest as there has ever been.

Spammers, do you realize that you are collecting crushing wrath and millions of bad karma points every time you send out one of those spam mails? This has got to be bad for your health. I'd worry about it if I were you.

17.12.06

Poetry mail from Madelyn Conner

Madelyn Conner (scosmic@mbmusa.net) is an online drug peddler. Like many of her brothers and sisters with their lofty names - every bit as sonorous as those of the authors of trashy novels - she resorts to fragments that might qualify as "modern literature" to beat spam filters:
of girl. I should have liked to know her. Good night, young him not - drank it, and fell dead. It was too old for him. It He bites. There was one boy - a certain J. Steerforth - who cut good deal though I was much less brave than Traddles, and nothing
Good-bye, Younghimnot! What sad fate to befall one.

No doubt we shall hear about that (un)certain J. Steerforth and Traddles and what became of him (her?) in future spam.

And who is the elusive "I" of the poem?